Spider Puns and Jokes

Spider Puns: Spiders are creepy creatures

Find a collection of spider-themed puns that you can use.

Spider Puns and Jokes

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.

Why did the spider go to the doctor? Because it had arachnophobia.

Why was the spider kicked out of the web? Because it had a lot of threadbare excuses.

Why was the spider’s computer slow? It had too many cobwebs.

Why was the spider’s power cord always tangled? It was a web-binder.

Why was the spider’s website so popular? It had a lot of catch-y content.

Why was the spider’s web in the trash can? It was a discarded web.

Why did the spider go to the costume party as a ghost? It wanted to be a spider-boo.

Why did the man return his new pair of spider silk trousers? They looked great, but the fly kept getting stuck.

Why did the nice little spider starve to death? He wouldn’t hurt a fly!

Why is it so easy for female black widows to find a mate? Because all the guys are dying to meet them!

What do you get when you cross a spider and an ear of corn? Cobwebs.

How do other spiders find a partner? They usually meet on the web!

What did the astronaut say when he found a spiderweb aboard the spaceship? Houston, weave got a problem!

What part of a computer does a spider use? The webcam.

What’s the best way to deal with spiders in the office? Hire them for web development.

Why did the man go on a date with a spider? His wife told him to take it out instead of killing it.

What do you call two spiders who just got married? Newlywebs.

What do you call it when a shark, a crocodile, and a giant spider walk into a bar? Another typical day in Australia!

What did the spider wife say to the spider husband when he tried to explain coming home late? “You’re spinning me a yarn here.”

Have you seen the film about an onion that turns into a spider? It’s called Shallot’s Web.